Introduction

I suppose it would be a good idea for me to introduce myself. I am a lesbian woman who is tired of being quiet. I am tired of being told don't say that, don't do that, don't wear that, don't eat that, etc. My entire life someone has been telling me "Don't do that!". Enough, I say. Nobody is going to tell me what to do or how to be anymore. I am my own person and I am going to shout it from the rooftops! Well, at least through this blog.

I lived most of my life in denial. I denied the part of me that said, "Hey, you like girls!" I was afraid of being deemed by society something less than the rest. It wasn't until I was in my 40's when I realized society did deem me less than the rest already so I may as well stop the denial and Come Out! That's exactly what I did. I came out to my mother first then my children(who were grown already). It felt so good and liberating to admit it out loud! I swore then I'd never be forced back into the closet. Wrong!

I met a truly wonderful woman on the internet and after months and months of speaking on the phone, we decided it was time to meet in person. It was decided that I would go visit her first. It was the most amazing two weeks of my life! Needless to say, we decided to live together. There really wasn't a discussion of who would go where since she had a full time job and was purchasing a house and I only worked part time and already owned a house. I moved to the south USA.

Being lesbian or gay in the south doesn't allow for that freedom I felt when I came out. I found myself pushed partially back into the closet. Most of society here does not accept our lifestyle. Okay, so maybe I can't be free in the south, but surely I can be free on the internet right? Wrong again.

I am an avid game player. Yes, its true! Not quite a month ago I discovered Wizard101. What a fun game it is! My sweetie and I play it together. She hasn't really even booted up her computer in the nearly two years we've been physically together but wizards and dragons is something that really interests her so she agreed to give it a try. She loves it also.

I began reading the forums and noticed there was a group called Wizard101Central that also had a forum and so much more. The forum also allows for groups or clans to be created by players. Fantastic! Maybe there was a clan for me! I searched 52 pages worth of clans. Nope, no gay or lesbian clan. Okay so, its player created. I know! I'll make one! So I spent hours creating the clan page, and making an icon for it and the whole 9 yards. I didn't want children to stumble across anything they shouldn't so I made all of the posts private. That means, you have to join the clan to see any of the posts we make. I would personally screen applicants to join to make sure there were no children. Better safe than sorry you know!

Well, I waited a couple of days. No response to the clan. Hmm..perhaps there just aren't any other gay or lesbians that play this game. But, come on, out of 5 million accounts, I couldn't be the ONLY lesbian/gay person playing it. The third day, I got a private message from someone on that forum. My clan was removed. Wow! Total censorship! But, that forum is not owned(as far as I know) by the owners of the game Wizard101 so I will not hold Wizard101 responsible. Its a fun game. Kids and adults alike play it. Its more of a mind game than a coordination game, which is really appealing to me. If you haven't heard of it or checked it out yourself, there's no time like the present. Take a look around the Wizard101 website.

Having a place to express myself is very liberating and helps maintain my sanity. Thank you, blogger.com for allowing me to have my voice.

More to come soon.